Super Stews- HAIR on the AIR goes up UP UP and AWAY

8/29 08-

Flying used to be glamorous. We dressed up to fly. When I was a kid we had to wear a jacket and tie to get on the plane to Philadelphia for the long flight to visit our Aunt and Uncle. Flight attendants (Airline Hostess’s and Stewardess’s back then) were dressed in crisp semi military fitted suits with epilates on the shoulders, smart little overseas wedge caps cocked to the side on their perfect French twist up dos , white gloves and high heels. Pan Am stewardesses were the most smartly dressed of all. Remember Jacqueline Bisset in the original movie “Airport”? She was the epitome of the last of that old school look. Then came Karen Black in “Airport 75” with her crossed eyes and the stringy pieces of over processed hair going into her mouth as she tried to land the 747. AWESOME! Her tangerine mini made her the icon of stewardess chic-especially when you’re that much of a mess in a dress.

The breakthrough was male stewardess’s which is when the PC term of flight attendant started. I remember flying to London on my first transatlantic flight when the guy who looked like Robert Redford came up to buckle me in, and my gay Geiger counter went to maximum output. My dream of being a male flight attendant was born. Fantasies of 3 day layovers in Rome, marrying a dreamy pilot, or first class business tycoon reinforced my dream to enter the realm of these beautiful people that serve beverages so elegantly with a bitchy edge; the glamorous field of commercial aviation. TWA, and Pan AM were the high end fashion airlines then, and my first hurdle was the weight requirement. They weigh you in, and if you were over the line, forget it. My Stewardship candle then started to dim into a lifetime of celery sticks and low fat cottage cheese. Hairdressing, makeup and styling was now overtaking my career path. I realized that I could devote myself to keeping flight attendants glamorous, or even more handsome, and to this day I have quite a few clients that fly. I love them.

Now in the days of airline deregulation, terrorism, and the post 911 era, flight attendants have toughened up a lot. Do not mess with them. (“You need to stow that hand luggage RIGHT NOW”! Or, “Sir, we are on an ACTIVE runway, and if you don’t sit down we’re going to have to call security.”) They have become the integral stewards of safety and take no crap efficiency on an airplane. Their roles have expanded far beyond the point were the beverage service is the most important function. Polyester Pantsuits, white blouses with coffee stains, and sensible shoes have given way to that romantic stereotypical image of the stewardess of yesteryear.

HOWEVER, when a flight attendant finds out that you are a makeup artist or a hairdresser, it is still the best upgrade card you can play. Flight attendants and hairdressers are like magnets to each other. We love them; they love us. It took about 4 minutes during pre-boarding this morning for the “purser” (senior ranking stew) to find out who I was, and tell me that she had been the 2nd runner up, and Miss congeniality in the 1991 Miss Wisconsin pageant for the Miss America franchise (it really IS a scholarship pageant-let’s get that straight.) Her talent was the flute: “Flight of the Bumble Bee.” She still subscribes to “Pageantry Magazine.”(my favorite behind “American Cheerleader.”) She whipped out a stunning picture of her evening gown and crown from 19 years ago displaying a perfect “toe pop”,pinky fingers on thighs, and teeth so white you could see them from the space shuttle. A champion is a champion forever and always. Inside that take no crap veneer, pumps the heart of a true beauty queen.

I change planes in Los Angeles to an Aero Mexico flight, where the flight attendant mystique of the past now a days lives on. Latin and Italian airlines still have the concept that being a flight attendant is one-step away from being a runway model. The women at Aero Mexico all grease their hair back into face lift tight Evita Peron low buns, with Tammy Faye eyes, and the ever present brown lip liner. Latin girls cannot seem to get past the pink lipstick/brown lip liner conundrum. Their skin tight short-skirted black suits with miniature silver sombreros lining the arm and skirt seems are the best in the business. Some Asian airlines even have Kimono style uniforms. Alitalia Airlines wins the overall presentation gold medal. Armani designed uniforms cut on the bias, are accessorized with leather. They all glide down the catwalk of the airplane aisles during the preflight announcement, removing their tight leather gloves finger by finger with the synchronized precision of Olympic diving. As on the Aero Mexico flights, the passion and sexuality crackles between the flight and cabin crews, and one can only imagine what has gone on behind the pulled curtain of the forward galley all these years.

Next time your flying through Atlanta or Dallas remember that your in the “hot roller belt” and keep your eyes peeled for the fabulous dos and shoes on the men and women that work for the airlines. But when your in Mexico City, Rome, or Buenos Aires your in the sweet spot. In fact, I attended the “Miss Flight Attendant 1998” pageant 10 years ago in Puente del Este, Uraguay. Now THAT was a smorgasbord of airline beauty, dominated by the south Americans. Miss Lan Chile Airlines robbed the title from Miss Varig Airlines that year. I recommend this fantastic competition which takes place every January to all.

Happy flying.

Snip and Tell

We hold the secrets. We listen. We console. We acknowledge and appreciate you when you sit in the chair. Our job is to help make you FEEL good about yourself, as well as look good. And remember our motto: It feels good to look good. God, we love our job. When a client walks out feeling better then when they walked in, we have done our job well. If you've been thinking about cutting your hair into something new-GO AHEAD!! Hmmm, maybe I should cover a little of this grey-GO AHEAD!! Maybe I'll go red for the fall, I've always wanted to...GO AHEAD!! You'll feel better about yourself. Ask your stylist what they really truthfully think would look good. "If you could do anything you wanted to my hair what would you do, and why?" The reason you should go to a good stylist in the first place is for their expertise and knowledge on what works and what doesn't. TELL your stylist about your life style. Be honest. "I have two kids to get off to school, and get to work. I can spend 5 minutes on my hair. With my texture, face shape, and time constraint what will work for me?" TELL your stylist the truth. "I hate blow drying, can you give me a cut that doesn't need any styling?" or "I use a flat iron everyday, hot rollers, and blow dry the wave out. How do I keep my hair healthy looking?" These are the things you should discuss and TELL your stylist. Have a relationship where you trust, collaborate, and aren't afraid to TELL your stylist what you think. "It was to short last time." So, OK, let's grow it out a bit so that your more comfortable with the length, but it's my job to be honest and remind you that your wispy soft short cut, looks dead fabulous with your Valentino suit, and the Narz lipstick we picked out last time, and you got the promotion a week after your last cut. TELL your stylist about your job, your relationships, (he likes it blonder) your schedule, your new water aerobics class in the chlorine pool, your vacation to the beach coming up, (wear a hat) or your upcoming court appearance. (always wear an off white suit, pearls, and your hair in a low chignon bun for the honest understated look whenever you have to testify) The point is TALK to your hairdresser; interact, and develop a rapor. Your hair, your presence, and youir whole look will develop and transform. Remember, it feels good to look good.

Hair on the Air in on RadioyouBoston HD2 on Thursday nights from 7-8, but don't worry if you don't live in Boston, just go to http://www.RadioYouBoston.com , iTunes or http://www.hairontheair.com and listen online. If you have a question, topic, or comment that you want the guys to answer, call the 24 hour HOTLINE: 617 418-HAIR (4247), shoot them an email at http://www.hairontheair.com or better yet, on Thursday nights between 7-8pm CALL IN LIVE: (617) 822-6211 and take your turn in the chair.

8/21/08 Hair on the Air reality check

We got kicked off the air tonight at the last moment due to some concert recording that needed to use our studio...yeah, whatever. We were going to talk about Senator Joe Biden"s hair plugs tonight. Could a Vice President have obvious hair plugs? Call in and tell us what you think for next week. At least it's not a comb over.

We love RadioYouBoston, our new home for the summer. We are trying to get our summer shows on our iTunes account and it looks like it will happen. Jeez, so technical. Last weeks show was about the Olympics (Oh please, that little Chinese girl gymnast is like 12. She has BABY TEETH.) And what's up with the shower cam for the divers. They all showboat and face the camera while in the shower, and totally go for the money shot. I would too if I had abs like that and looked that hot in a speedo. Michael Phelps looks great with all the gold medals around his neck and the buzz cut, but I'll always be a Mark Spitz fan. I had that poster for years in my dorm room, and he looked like one of the original "Village People" with that big butch mustache. To think he broke all those records without a razor suit, a giant mustache to drag along, and that big 70's haircut- well, he's still a God in my Olympic heart. Don't forget this is from the sports fan who can only name 3 Red Sox players (2 now that Manny is gone) and holds up Tanya Harding as my favorite sports star.

Please remember that you can all send us a Hair on the Air HOTLINE message/question/topic/comment any time of day or night on 617 418 HAIR (2427) We'll play it on the air if it's not to naughty or nasty. We want to hear from you!!
http://www.RadioYouBoston.com is the place to go to check us out on Thursday nights from 7-8pm and http://www.hairontheair.com is the place to send us emails to read on the air, and connect to our past shows on iTunes. We LOVE having a blog!! This is to cool.
ALFRED and THOMAS